Final Countdown DAY SIX:Packing the Bathroom and Medicine Cabinet

WRITTEN 2015 WHILE PACKING TO LEAVE HAWAII

DAY SIX:

Today I focused on two things.

• First, I gathered, sorted, and packed all of the Bathroom and Vanity contents. While sorting these items I asked myself which items I hadn't used in the five months I've been here. If they weren't used, they were thrown out or put in the donate pile. Also, I donated any items that I had multiples of such as combs, shampoos, and lotions. 
• Second, I gathered, sorted, and packed the contents of our medications cupboard.  With these items I kept most items but donated any multiples. 

Throughout all of the years of traveling and moving long distances we have two bags that have been very helpful along the way. They are the LLBean Personal Organizer Toiletry Bag, Family Size. I have a Blue one for Toiletries and a Red one for Medications. When flying, I pack the bags separately and then pack them together in a duffel bag to be checked in. This way I don't have to worry as much about all of the flight restrictions for carry on items. 

Must Have Chocolate!

WRITTEN AROUND 2012/13 WHILE PREPPING FOR MOVING TO MISSOURI. )

(Written years ago. Published in 2020) 

It's sad that the busiest, most important week of the month has to fall right during this time frame of "my month"  Marge came with a vengeance last night precisely at 5PM. Marge is my evil twin. She battles anxiety, irritability, fatigue, and brain fog. All to a maximum!  The switch is always noticeable and still after all of this time, Shocking!

The fact that I'm on my own, packing up the troops, and Caleb is practically unmedicated make it all almost too much. But the blessing that gets me through is that I know that it will pass and the next phase, though filled with migraines and Iron supplements, is better than "Marge." It all passes. It all changes. And just knowing that it's not going to be permanent makes it bearable.

I picked up the kids from school today and we went to the grocery store. We were all really hungry. We walked out (almost forgetting the milk) with bags filled with frozen pizzas, mint chocolate chip ice cream, frozen burritos, a symphony candy bar and a Reese's Peanut butter Cup to top it all off.  Yes, like I said, Marge was in charge. :)

Well, the troops are asleep now. So I'm going to call it a night. Thank you Xanex and chocolate for saving all of us tonight!

Family Update: Air Force - Homestead - and the Priesthood

WRITTEN 2015/16

(During the wonderful healthy time which led to getting pregnant with the child I knew was still supposed to come. That pregnancy kicked my butt. As they all did.)

We have created our new "Normal" here in Alton, Utah.  We've all finally acclimated to the higher elevation and can breath much better. Our skin and noses are still very much missing the humidity. But that will come in time as well and we will move on to acclimating to the Cold temperatures that are quickly approaching. Life is good here.

Months ago Leif went through the process of applying to become a Medical Officer in the USAF. Everything was complete except the interview with the Chief Nurse. Hawaii was going through a change in command and he wasn't able to meet with someone before he had to leave the island for his new work contract in California. He had warned his recruiter in advance that he would be probably be relocating to CA and was assured that there wouldn't be a shake up in his application process. Well, that wasn't true. When he arrived in California his Hawaii recruiter passed him a name and phone number and dropped him like a rock. That person was on Leave and the time came and went for the process to be completed with no further communication or answers to Leif's calls. Therefore, the journey of the Air Force life will not be in our future within this year. And most likely, not ever. 

It has been years since I have felt the drive and peace about settling down and establishing some roots. We feel that now. I don't know what the future holds. But at least I know that I won't have to pack us all up within the year and move again.  The kids are thriving in their new school. And I Love working with our animals and land on our little family homestead.

Leif is working hard in California and has extended his contract through February.  From there, I'm not sure what his career path will be. We miss him often. But are settled in here and find a lot of joy with Erik and Stacey and their daughter Victoria. I'm able to handle the every day challenges three weeks out of my cycle and one week is a nightmare filled with a lot of loneliness and anxiety.  But we know the pattern and are able to work through it with the love and support of Heaven and family around us. 

I still revel in the miracle of renewed health and strength. This weekend I was able to toss logs for splitting for a couple of hours as well as bales of hay to feed the animals. Along with mothering duties and caring for the animals. Strength like that still humbles me and fills me with gratitude and amazement. 

Jakob turned 12 years old in August and Leif was able to come home and ordain him to the Aaronic Priesthood. This was a very special event in Jakob's life and he takes it very seriously. He is a precious son of God with a tender heart, willing to do what is right. I feel blessed to be his mother. 

Within this month I was able to find the Miniature Shetland Pony of my dreams. He has been a great soothing distraction for me. As well as a blessing for JJ, who loves to ride and care for him. 

We are very blessed and I feel our Father in Heaven's hand in my life daily. Without Him, I would be lost and wandering in a hard, hard, journey. Praise Be, to Him!!

Questions From Karin

JULY 2017

My dear friend Karin sent me a great list of questions to help me sift through my thoughts and decisions and ultimately, my attitude:

What is it about your situation that is so intolerable?  
I think at this point the main struggles are the lack of windows and circulation in the basement. Which leads to stagnant smells and must. And upstairs is filled with animal; no matter how hard it is tried to be kept up. Also the bathroom downstairs is feeling very small and bug infested. Also a bitter/sweet thing is that the kitchen is upstairs. So every time food is needed or wanted I have to walk up and down stairs. It has probably helped me not gain weight. Because I don't always want to go up; socially and/or physically. There's also guilt that I can't help keep up the kitchen. I do what I can. There haven't been too much complaining. But the guilt is there. Also I hate that we can't always give them money for rent and living expenses. Again, no complaining from them. But they deserve and need money. It's also getting hard to share food. Our family requires a totally different supply of food then they need.

Is it the remoteness of Alton?
I didn't even get into that in the above question. YES! This is HUGE! Having to make a shopping trip a planned grand event is so hard. The planning and remembering everything is hard too. Also, little things like running to pick things up. Even to the gas station or dollar store it takes over an hour round trip and shopping.  But the beauty of the scenery is Outstanding! So I have guilt about this issue too.

Or the closeness of the people you are with?
Luckily, this isn't as huge as it could be. Everyone is just laid back enough that there isn't as much anxiety as there could be. But it is an issue if I get in a funk and I don't want anyone to witness my worst. It's also hard to be involved right in their struggles too at times.

Is home school really an option for you on your own, or just with (my/Karin's) help? 
This is a very good question. We are considering traveling with the kids for one more school year before Leif's Nurse Practitioner Residency. I/we all know that I CAN'T pull it off alone. But I'm wondering if we could if the kids had teachers they remotely had to report to and follow? I honestly don't know without trying. But no doubt it's not the easy answer!

How would the commute to Orderville to both drop off and pick up affect your family?  
You're right, it's crazy talk! Leif is OK with commuting to work. But commuting the kids to school from Kanab or Fredonia is insanity!

What about the barn in Fredonia?
It's no longer an option until Leif's brother moves out.  And we have No Idea when that might happen.  And YES, An RV is FAR From realistic at this point. Especially the laundry and food storage.

What about being alone, just living with your family without other adults scares you? 
Well, when I was early pregnant, I was scared to be alone because I needed help with the kids. But honestly, at this point, the thought doesn't scare me at all. In fact, sometimes I just long for the bubble or just us. But in reality, I do much better mentally when I have friends and family close by to connect with. But it's not a must.

What is the biggest difference living with another family makes?
The HELP! Food prep, laundry, dishes, tag teaming, babysitting. But it has to be JUST the right dynamic duo.  Or it becomes a nightmare.

How does it hurt your family?
I think the fact that the kids and us have to work with a co-parenting situation. Luckily, it's not bad within this current setting. But it's not perfect either.

How does it help or hurt my relationship with Leif?
I think it takes a burden off of Leif's shoulders to know I have help and company all the time. But luckily, he doesn't rely on that fact to take away his responsibilities and role in our relationship!!

FEAR
Am I afraid of being alone with my kids?
I don't really fear being alone with them. I just get feeling guilty because I am boring and lazy.

Afraid of having to do all the meals, laundry, entertaining by myself?
Again, not really a fear as much as a huge overwhelming pressure.

keeping the kids entertained?
HUGE! This is a Huge frustration for me. It makes me tired and sad just thinking about it. Because they are now old enough that they don't expect me to entertain them. So trying to is actually harder then just letting them do their own thing; that isn't always the best use of time.
===
How long do I see our next step being?
First, we have the step of waiting for the baby, which is another 2+ months.
Second, we have a school year until Leif starts his Residency.
Third, we have Leif's residency which is three years in the same place.

Is Alton out of the question forever?
I think Alton will now always be on the table as a place to live. Especially, when we can afford our own place. But the more Leif and I talk and he allows himself to accept my shortcomings (depression and melancholia) It looks more and more like we will be moving from Alton in January.  But to where and what, is still undecided. the current two choices being mulled around are:
1. Travel Nurse as a family for a school year and try to grow our money reserves.
2. Choose where to settle down for the residency and go there and settle down.
I think I've helped Leif clearly understand that I am TERRIFIED to stay in the basement throughout the entire school year (so the kids get another good year of school) because I fear I will fall into a deep depression and miss out on everything and the joy of the baby. The "healthiest" place for me to live is California or Hawaii. Or probably the gulf coast. Sunshine and Ocean. But we also might go toward family in Missouri.

Do I do OK when living with our little family alone by Leif's job? 
My moods still fluctuate, for sure! But if the climate and people are good around us. Then I'm able to work things out. Being in the middle of nowhere in a place like MO. is not a good place for me. I need action and activity to Force me to get up and out of the house.

Do I do better emotionally with the support of another female in the home to share responsibilities? 
Yes, for a while. We're going on a year now here. I am now feeling the desire to just go it on my own. But give it a little while and I'll remember the beauty of sharing the load. But not to the point of falling apart usually. Unless I get really sick. But the future health journey is really an unknown right now.

Have you lived so much without Leif that it's easier to have him gone than at home? 
With this contract, and being pregnant and "sick" I ABSOLUTELY MISS HIM! But before the pregnancy it was getting easier to have him gone. Especially if he was coming and going in short but long enough intervals to throw off the routine.

Am I replacing my relationship with Leif with those of the other adults in the home?
Luckily, no. He is still the most important and my confidant. However, carrying the load of everyday responsibilities may be a little heavier for my SIL. Although, she does a good job of not taking on more then she can handle. Sometimes I long for more help to keep our space clean.

I need to think more on these questions:

What are my goals for my family?
Where do I hope to be in five years? Ten years? 
What do we need to do now to make this a reality?

Dear Grandma

WRITTEN  JUNE 29, 2019

Dear Grandma,
Today would be the absolute Perfect day for you to be around! I couldn't shake off sleep this morning. I have been sucked in now until 1:45. I did help Jakob get ready and drove him to school/piano lessons. But I dropped in to bed when I got home.

I'm finally out of bed and we're ready to "start" our day. Company would be nice.

A Lesson on Motherhood

WRITTEN JULY 29, 2022 (SAVED AS A DRAFT) PUBLISHED AUGUST 18, 2024.

I'm happy to share my testimony in Sacrament today. However, speaking on Mother's Day is a tough one for me.  Mother's Day is a Very special holiday. Because Motherhood is a Holy calling and deserves celebration. 

But for most of us as women and mother's Mother's Day ends up being filled with an ocean of mixed emotions. At least that's how it is for me. When it comes to my relationship with my own Mother, we are friends and I Love her. But we are not best friends. And our relationship is actually a trial in my life. 

I used to dream of the day that I could celebrate Mother's Day as a mother. Now it's here and it's not all it's cracked up to be. For me, a large part of my Mother Heart is missing from this earth. And Mother's Day tends to be a good reminder of that fact. Along with our precious boys, we have twin daughters who passed away due to complications during pregnancy. They would be nine years old. I know I am not alone in this pain on Mother's Day.

With that said, I will share one of the greatest truths a mother can learn. And something that has blessed my life profoundly. I believe that if we can embrace what I am about to share with you today as a mother, then we will truly be able to feel the Joy of Motherhood that we are intended to feel along the journey.

I did not write this beautiful lesson. But I have managed to apply it during some very difficult years and I know that it is an inspired piece of writing meant for all of us to hear as women and mothers. 

(I must have gotten interrupted. Sorry, I don't remember the "beautiful lesson. "😆)

Let It Be Known: Artificial Intelligence

Let it be known that my prediction of the devastating potential of Artificial Intelligence is, that it will be the slow death of the human mind's original creativity. 

The Miracle - So Much Better

Tonight I read the last several blog posts I wrote. I realized that I haven't written about The Miracle!  Isn't that how it is though, experience the miracle that sets you free, and never look back to say Thank You? Well, actually, I have Definitely looked back Many Many times to thank Father in Heaven for this miracle!

In February 2022 I reached out to the medical world and asked for a prescription of Lamictal. I had come to the very last strand of my rope. And I knew that if something didn't change, I wouldn't be able to do all that was absolutely Required of me in the upcoming years. 

So, I went back to researching my symptoms at that time. And I found Lamictal. It was an absolute MIRACLE that my primary physician was willing to prescribe it for me even though protocol says a psychiatrist needs to prescribe it. 

Anyway, eventually I was signed up with a great psychiatrist (another miracle!) Within a month of taking the medication I knew that we were on the edge of something Amazing. At the same timeframe I had started back on phentermine for weightloss and was starting to follow a pattern of intermittent fasting. In the meantime, I had an IUD placed that stopped the profuse monthly bleeding. 

By the time Summer came I was feeling better then I have felt in Year's! It was absolutely Incredible!!!  Not perfect, but so much more able to function normally. When fall hit we upped the medication to ward of any potential seasonal depression and lethargy. And that never came. Thanksgiving came and I was able to clean the whole house, plan and prepare a feast, and follow through with Fantastic results. My internal celebration was on constant repeat. I couldn't remember feeling so alive and clear minded. Winter set in and Christmas season started and it only got better. I was even able to wake up before the kids and READ scriptures. I hadn't read like that for a decade, at least. 

There really are no words to explain how beautiful it feels to "feel" alive. Not just "be" alive. By February I had lost a little over 20 pounds. Life was incredibly stressful as usual. But I have continued to feel well. Things kindof balanced out over this last month. The initial euphoria is over. And the weather has wreaked havic on my ability to push through and stay well. It has rained consistently since New Year's Eve. ... It's April. So, it isn't surprising that my body is fighting to go in to hibernation mode. 

But even now, I still feel better and function better then I have in years! And that, is THE MIRACLE!!! 

An Interview With Twix a.k.a. Twixie Girl

Twix is our foster English Bulldog puppy. We are fostering her for Lily's Pad Rescue. Twix has Spina Bifida. This is a neurological condition that affects her hind end. Her back legs are weak and wobbly. And she is incontinent. Which means that her body has no control over her bowels or her bladder. Twix wears diapers 24/7. 

Benifits Of Diaper Dogs

As a Foster Mama, I prefer diaper puppies because I don't have to stress about accidents and house training. And I don't have to plan ahead for potty breaks. I do have to make time for diaper changes. But I can make that schedule work for me. 

Here is an "Interview" with Twix. Enjoy! If you're interested in adopting Twix, contact www.Lilyspadrescue.org

AN INTERVIEW WITH TWIX

1. What is your name? Twix, Twixie, Twixie Girl.

2. How old are you? Almost 1 Year old.

3. How much do you weigh? I weigh 30 pounds. I probably need to lose a few pounds, and definitely not gain any.

4. How is your health? Good! 

5. How’s your mobility? I am mobile. But I walk on the wrong part of my feet. And my hips are weak. So I'm a little wobbly and unsteady. I can run fast and walk like a big girl. But I'm not brave or steady enough to go up or down a flight of stairs. I can walk up one or two steps. But I have to be carried up or down more than that. I am currently in Physical Therapy. And that is helping me a lot.

6. What do you look like? I'm black, brown, and caramel. Just like a Twix candy bar.🍫

7. What do you like to eat? ANYTHING! You can get me to do almost anything if you have a treat for me. I eat so fast I don't even taste it. And Mama says I'm strange, but I Really like the smell and taste of feet.

8. What kind of personality do you have? I am often told that I'm adorable. And Mama says she agrees. I am willing to learn all about good manners. I absolutely Love any human that walks in the door. Big humans and tiny humans. My best human friend right now is little. He says he's 5. And I play hard with him. But I know not to bite him like I play with my fur friends. I know how to hold still during diaper changes too. I even know how to sit for a treat! I am a sweet and happy girl!

9. Describe your perfect day: Mama calls me her Sunshine Girl. I LOVE to sit and bask in the sun. On the porch, on the grass, in the dirt, or in front of a window. My perfect day would be to relax and play in the sun. Although, I am perfectly happy playing inside too.

10. What is your favorite toy? I love squeaky balls. And nylon bones. When I first got to Mama's, I wasn't quite sure what was a toy or a "NO" But now I understand and enjoy chewing on bones and dog toys.

11. Do you know any tricks? I'm working on Fetch. I just need to figure out how to "Bring It Back". Whatever that means!?

12. Is there anything that scares you? Not really.

13. Have you been around children? Yes! And I Love them!

14. Do you like cats? I haven’t been around cats yet. I would probably want to play with them. But not hurt them.

15. How do you feel about other dogs? I Love other dogs. I think I would be lonely if I didn't have other dogs to wrestle and play chase with.

16. If you could be anywhere in the world, where would it be? With a loving family. At home, or on the road. I love to be out and about. 

17. Who do you live with in your foster home (kids, dogs, etc) and who is your closest companion? I live with Mama and Papa and their four boys. I also live with two other English Bulldogs. And Papa has chickens that I'm learning are "His". I love my fur brother and sister. But I also adore my 5 yr old boy.

18. Where do you hang out when you are home alone? I am crate trained and am ok hanging out in my crate. Especially, if I have a nice bone to chew on.

19. Where do you sleep? I sleep in my crate. When Mama puts a blanket over my crate, I know that means that it's bedtime. I Love naps with my famiky too, of course!

20. Do you like walking on a leash? I will if I have too. But it's still confusing for me. I'm much happier in my stroller.

21. Do you have any "not-so-great" habits that we should know about? Well, sometimes if I get left alone in a messy room, I get confused about what is a food, a toy, or a "NO"! So sometimes I'll chew on a box or swallow an earplug. And sometimes I think I'm supposed to eat my poop if I see it. But overall, I'm a well mannered girl.

22. What’s your potty situation? I am incontinent. Which means that I wear diapers all of the time. I am very good during diaper changes.

23. Do you like water? I'm curious about water. And I don't mind my baths.

24. What do you love about your foster family? I love that I have a lot of company so I don't feel bored or lonely. I love that my family understands my special needs and is able to take care of me and take me to any vet or physical therapy appointments that I have. 

25. What was your life like before being brought into Lily's Pad Rescue? I was rescued by ChunkzNTubz Rescue in SoCal when I was about 8 months. When I was rescued I had/have scars around my lady parts because no one cared for my potty needs and the urine burned my skin. When Lily's Pad took over my care because of my special needs I was about 10 months old. Mama is my Foster Mom. When I came to Mama I couldn't walk very well at all. I slid around on my side. And pulled myself with my front legs. But I have worked Really Hard and now I'm able to walk on all four legs most of the time. Mama says that I look like a little grizzly bear cub from behind. I'm really cute!

Before

After

Puppy Keeps Eating Treat Bag

Molly, our new puppy, is a constant food seeker. No matter how much and how often she's fed, she's hunting for food. Sometimes this is a nutritional deficiency problem. For her it's an emotional psychological problem. Most likely due to neglect at birth and until she was rescued. 

The most frustrating struggle right now is she keeps finding the treat bag used for diaper time and eating the entire bag before we know it. She could down it in seconds. She's done it 3 times. This third time she pulled the diaper box off of the fireplace and dug out the cheerios I was using since she'd eaten the bag of treats the day before. And no matter how angry I get and her time outs, so far she's not able to control her urge. So, sadly, she's kennaled unless I'm in the room. She goes for toilet paper too. So she can't be free to wander. With so many people in the house I can't keep all of her temptations at bay. So, she's restricted. And of course she's upset about that. But sadly, she'll probably stop trying to bark. Because it won't be answered. Poor Girl! Her early trauma is so sad. I PRAY that she'll mature and accept that she has to resist her urge to purge;) 

Until then, I have to breathe and focus on all that we love about her and snuggle her as often as time allows. Puppy raising is as hard as raising a two year old. It's a huge commitment. But we didn't go into her adoption blindly. But I pray that she'll come out strong and happy. I'll have to research about more therapeutic ideas too.

BREATHE AND LOVE...

Busy Times

So many big things are happening now and in the near future. I need to start blogging again! I need to be able to look back on these days. I really hope I can stick with this blogging thing again. 

Jakob's mission prep and now potential BYU application is the biggest thing on our minds. Always in the back of my mind. Even though there is SO MUCH happening on a day to day basis.

We have all 4 boys going to 4 different schools. Luckily, Jakob can drive himself. Luckily we were able to get a third car. But that's a stress financially. Which means Jakob needs to get a job. Which is a big stress. I hope we can help him follow through with that. None of us want him to work. It's very helpful to have him home. But financially he needs to work.

Most of my day is carpooling. And during the down time I'm caring for the dogs or catching my breath for a moment. Which means the housework is piling up. Always nagging and incredibly frustrating. I wish I had the guts and was humble enough to call in the church troops for help. But I'd like to think that I'm not the only one with this struggle. And that it wouldn't be fair for me to ask for help if they're in the same boat. ... but wowza could we use Audrey our past nanny right now!!!  Sad thing is, we couldn't pay help anyway. Really, I should be working. But that's not realistic. I've offered to do pet sitting. But I think we both know that that would br more stress then it's worth. Leif's just trying to work extra hours. Bless him!

I'm listening to the dogs play fight outside my door. They're a good distraction. But a stress too. Lot's of vet appointments. Thank Heavens for CareCredit that helps us spread the payments out.

Well, my few minutes to myself and rare moment to bath is up. It was nice while it lasted.

Written December 2018

Leif and Lena Baron Family
Christmas Update for 2018

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all of our Dear Friends and Family!!  We hope that this letter finds you well and happy. Our family is doing well! We've officially lived in California for one year now. Three months in Bakersfield and nine months in Huntington Beach.

Leif is working in Compton at MLK Community Hospital as a permanent float pool RN and is no longer a travel nurse. He enjoys the hospital and his co-workers. And they Love him! As a float pool nurse he is assigned to departments all over the hospital including the ER and the ICU. His latest evaluation was filled with praise and gratitude from the administration. Can't beat that! He is also finishing up his final year of his Masters Degree as a Family Nurse Practitioner. It's amazing to think that there's a light at the end of that tunnel. Leif and I finally convinced ourselves, and the ward leadership, that we will truly be staying here. Leading them to give us each a calling in the ward. Leif is serving in the primary and I am in the primary presidency as second counselor.  Leif is an amazing nurse. But he is an even better father and husband. He brings a life and light to our home that is hard to beat.

Lena, well, I'm doing well! I am happy. And I have all that I could ask for. I have a testimony of my Savior and His gospel. I have an amazing husband. I have seriously, Seriously, amazing children. Especially my sweet baby who is currently my constant companion. Which I know was absolutely meant to be for this time in my life. I live in a beautiful part of the country in a place close to the ocean, sunshine, and all of the conveniences of life that a mother could ask for. I am making good friends along the way. And keeping friends old and new from around the world. My cup runneth over, really. On the harder days I have plenty of good things to keep me from falling too deep, for too long into the dark. We have finally narrowed down the names and diagnosis' to my ailments. Which has been a lifelong journey up to this point.  And we are only steps away from getting control of a lot of the struggles I face daily. I feel very very grateful and blessed!!

Jakob. Jakob. Honestly, Jakob is the linchpin of the family right now. His mood and influence determines much of how the rest of the house feels. Gratefully, he is most often cheerful, helpful, silly, and uplifting. Wherever Jakob is, there will be music. He revolves around listening to, exploring, and creating music. All different genres :)  Jakob has full blown ADD. So this means that he is a constant multitasker. For example, right now he's listening to his current music, while playing or watching his favorite computer game of War Thunder (currently as a Fighter Pilot), all while juggling his baby brother. Really,  that's a small scale example for him. Most of the time he's flipping through several different random YouTube things he's researching at the moment. All while playing and listening to music. He's pretty impressive. His parkour, writing, and acting skills are equally impressive. He is now a Teacher in the Priesthood and takes this very seriously. Jakob has a "presence" about him. He makes a big impact on whatever, whoever, and where ever he is. I love to watch him interact with the kids at church and school. He's so unique. Yet, they all admire him. It's pretty fascinating to watch. Jakob has his health challenges too. Which we're finally able to address. His rheumatologist is the chief rheumatologist of the children's hospital and is a great doctor. Jakob's up against some challenges with Juvenile Arthritis. But he'll tackle them like a champ. Of that I have no doubt.

Caleb, what would we do without Caleb!? Caleb "shakes things up a bit", every day. 😁 He is showing so much progress in school. He's in the 4th grade and we love to watch his writing and spelling improve as he puts his mind to it daily. Caleb has a kind and tender heart. He really wants everyone around him to be their best self. Caleb still Loves WWII and military history, especially anything about tanks and tank battles. Caleb still battles Autism and ADHD. But he has mastered many “life skills” by now that have moved him forward in many ways. We are so proud of him and love every ounce of him and all that he is.


JJ, or rather, “Jonathan”, as he has chosen to go by at school; is as wonderful and complex as his full given name of Jonathan Jefferson Lee Baron. 😲 He was baptized this summer and his tender spirit and desire to do good reflects the commitment to Christ he made. He is doing great in school. And has made a lot of friends. Which means that he's finally able to go a week or more without talking about how much he misses Alton (his favorite place to live). 😉 JJ Loves dinosaurs and hopes to be a paleontologist some day. JJ is a great brother. Especially with Joshua. He will read and play with him for hours. I also love to watch JJ and Caleb navigate their relationship. I often compare them to “two grumpy old men, sittin’ on a porch, tryin’ to outdo each other as they talk story.” 😂 They know that if I start calling them “Frank” and “Bob”, that it's time for them to simmer down and make some peace. 💓

Joshua. Our precious Little Caboose. I would be, and was, lost without him. I love all of my children! But each of them has had the season where they are “My Baby.” And this is his. Though, I have a feeling that his season might last just a little bit longer then the others did. ;) Joshua is what I call a “conflicted introvert”.  Much like his Papa, he can be the life of the party and yet be one who would rather hang back within his own thoughts and observations. He has a presence about him, much like Jakob. People are drawn to his warmth. Though his quick smile and strawberry blonde curls help him in this regard, i’m sure. He will jibber jabber to people, himself, the windows, and to his toys, all day long. Telling all of his favorite stories.
He LOVES HIS BROTHERS and will mimic their every word and action. Truthfully, the only real word that he says without hesitation and with full understanding is  “pray” .And he brings his two hands together in the sign of prayer. It shocked and tickled us when he surprised all of us one night at family prayer. Otherwise, there's a lot of testing of sounds and signs. But few true blue words. He says “mama”. But rarely with a purpose. Joshua is healthy for the most part. He's walking, eating, and doing all the cute things a 15 month old baby should. The only concern that still lingers from his rough and early birth is the possibility of some nerve or neurological damage with his right arm. It's very subtle. But he crawls on a fist and his arm gives out on him here and there. So we're meeting with a Pediatric Neurologist about that. He also has a problem with his right eye. It likes to wander outwards on occasion. So that will be fixed later. Once the muscles are grown more. So, all in all, for a baby who came out not breathing for a bit, we are So Very Grateful for the health and strength he is blessed with. And for the treasure that he has become within our family.

Thank you all for catching up with us! Please know that we Love you all and miss you and your company. Also, please remember that there are  ALWAYS Good Things To Come in this life! We must not give up! Please endure to the end, In Christ. For, we know with all of our hearts that He will carry us through all things.

With Love,
The L&L Baron Family