Monday, August 31, 2009

Thanks For The Motivation

WOW! I really had no idea how many people were visiting my various blogs. I added the feed widget to my blog and it's so fun to have an idea of who is thinking about me and finding my blogs through their searches. I hope all of you are enjoying your visits to my blogs. You give me motivation to update some of my more neglected blogs and keep them up.

Thanks for visiting!
BTW: I know that my last post was overwhelming. Thank you for your thoughtful comments and for enduring the moments that I dump my heart out on the table. My dear friend Harmony went beyond the call of duty as a friend today. She said that she felt the need to help me during my "baby Loss" moments but had no idea what to say. So she went online. She told me that she found a network of ladies who have lost twins and have formed a support group for each other. I am looking forward to following it a bit to find out some of their experiences. I know that my strong drive to have twins stems from my mind and body telling me that I have unfinished business to complete. It will be interesting to see what other mother's have experienced after losing their twins. Anyway, thank you Harmony for your love and support and all of you who are there for me during my Mother Heart moments;) May you be blessed!

Sunday, August 30, 2009

Deep Thoughts From My Mother Heart

I have started a blog where I write my deepest thoughts. Thoughts that I don't really care to share with the world. Some of the thoughts that I have tonight might fit into that category. However, I just think I will ramble tonight and maybe if any of you feel you have wisdom or insight that might help me, feel free to share.

As a whole, I am doing great! Tonight, I write when I am tired. So don't fear that I am overcome with weariness. It's just that the kids are asleep and I have a moment to process the thoughts and emotions rolling around in my soul. I sure wish the timer would ring and the rolling would stop... Anyway, I guess I should get to the point. My thoughts...

How is it possible for one to throw herself on the couch in exasperated frustration because of the kids and their naughty antics, ponder how she can possibly muster the energy to refrain from raising her voice at them one more time, and at the very same moment be pondering whether or not it is time for another baby, and actually WANT another baby!? And how is it possible for this same mother to be at her wits end with the kids, ponder the thought of another baby, and want TWINS on top of that!? I think I'm going insane!

I have dreamed that I am giving birth to twins several times in the last week. Last night I delivered a healthy boy and a girl. Yes, this desire for twins definitely stems from the twins that I have already delivered. Do I think that I will be satisfied with another set of twins? I have absolutely NO Idea. All I know is that there is a part of me that is obsessed with the idea of having another set of twins. Leif and I have discussed it many times, trying to figure out why I would be crazy enough to even ponder the thought. We've concluded that it's a subconscious longing that has moved into my conscious mind. For a few reasons having twins would be good. The main reason being that I would have two children and only one pregnancy. However, there are many obvious reasons why having twins would be, insane? Ludicrous? Difficult? Uhh, yeah. So, why can't I get rid of the desire? Now days, having twins isn't as spontaneous as it used to be. With modern medicine and the knowledge of the "right" herbal concoctions, having multiples is not a far fetched idea or impossibility. This does not help my struggle. So what am I going to do? I'm going to talk to my doctor. If I'm lucky, he'll help me understand the risks that my body might face if I conceive twins again. At the very least, he'll share some wisdom and compassion with me...

I think this thought is enough for one night. The others are just the usual gripes I have about public school. Although I do have a question for you more experienced mothers. Tell me, how often did/do your kindergartners come home from school with workbook pages as the school work they did in school, and then more workbook pages to complete at home for homework? Jakob has ONLY brought home workbook pages. You know, the "circle the cat on the top shelf" type pages. Am I wrong for expecting more from Jakob's teacher?

By the way: Caleb's walking, how sweet is that!? He still looses his balance every once in a while. But he's on his feet most of the time now:) Precious Times!

Saturday, August 29, 2009

He Loves Me!

Last night I wanted a treat that I haven't had for a while. I wanted Peanut Butter Panic ice cream and Chocolate Chip Cookies. I told this to Leif and he offered to go to the store without a thought(a 15 minute drive away) to pick some up for me. AND he took Jakob with him!

He called me at the store and let me know that I'd have to settle for a different ice cream instead (no worries) and told me he was on his way home. Soon after Jakob and Leif walked in the door Leif called out to me, "Honey, what ya doing tomorrow night? You want to go out with me?" I rounded the corner to talk with him and this is what I saw...

I am truly blessed! And to think that Jakob was involved warms my heart even more. Leif is a wonderful example to our sons of how to love their wives. A precious gift!

Eggsiting Discovery!

Did you catch the title of this post? If you did you may have caught the clue I gave of the GREAT Discovery!

YEP! Our chickens have started to lay eggs. We found the first prized egg yesterday afternoon. We are all excited. Jakob thinks he's the most excited. But Leif is by far the most excited. His hard work and care is paying off. Well Done, Love! Jakob keeps pulling the egg out of the fridge to admire it. It will be a miracle if it lasts long enough to cook with it. I guess we're going to blow the egg out of a whole in the shell and save the shell. Quite the treasure!

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

How Are We Doing?

I've had a few emails lately asking how we're doing. Usually I can send people to my blog and feel like they would be sufficiently caught up. That's not the case at the moment. So I thought I'd better take the time to blog.

The first question everyone wants answered is how is life with a puppy, a baby, and a kindergartner? Well, it's not easy. We knew it wouldn't be. You told me it wouldn't be. And it isn't. However, she is very sweet. Very cute. Obedient. And trainable. So, we'll keep her. Jakob enjoys having her around most of the time. He's not thrilled about her little bites and he doesn't feel like playing or carrying her up the stairs when he's tired or ornery. But for the most part I think he enjoys having her around. Caleb loves her. Even though he is her most valued chew toy. I've resorted to dressing him in long sleeved footy PJ's all day and spraying him with bitter spray to keep her at bay. It's almost impossible to get the two to stop playing rough. I try and teach Caleb and the puppy. But in the end, I just have to hope she'll grow out of her need to chew. She sleeps through the night until 5:50AM. This is the hardest part. I value my sleep. Once she's awake in the morning she will NOT stop barking unless she's able to run around for a while. During the day she'll stop barking after 5-10 minutes. Potty Trained? Well, she's litter box trained when she's inside her room (the pack n' play crib.) But she still struggles if we let her walk around the house very long without constant supervision. I'm hoping she'll learn to be out and about freely soon. Next week I will move her to Jakob's room full time so she can be in a bigger room. We'll see how it goes.

It was Jakob's birthday yesterday! Thank you so much to all of the family members who made a special effort to make it a special day for Jakob. We had a fun family party on Saturday with Leif's family in SG. Thank you Larissa for sharing your love and home! Thank you for the gifts and sweet cards everyone else. Jakob especially loved getting a card in the mail today from the good family members not too far from here. Thank you for remembering him!!!

Jakob started Kindergarten on his birthday. Birthday-wise that wasn't very fun. Especially because the teacher didn't have the kids sing happy birthday to him (yes, we told her ahead of time) and then she forgot to give the kids the cherry tomatoes that Jakob insisted on taking to the class for snack on his birthday. So that was a bummer. He said that he had a good time at school. However, he didn't really want to go this morning. So that was disturbing! But we encouraged him and tried to find a few good things to help him focus on and he went without too much fuss. He's sad because all of the kids from church are in the other class. I'm sad about that too. I'm frustrated that he keeps bringing workbook pages home (as class work) and then more work book pages home to do as home work. I can do that at home with him!!! I want the teacher to be CREATIVE! I pray this is just the first week and she's trying to get on her feet! We'll see... Today Jakob also got a package in the mail from Leif and I. We ordered a series of junior chapter books called Magic Tree House. He insisted that we start reading them right then and there. I'm really glad he enjoys reading!

Caleb is working hard on his walking skills. He's Thrilled by his new skill. He's also trying to use more words. Nothing Completely understandable. But we know he's trying.

Leif is working at the school again. He has also started his Fall Semester classes. So he's very busy! He was going to work for the Community College as well. But they just couldn't get organized so he had to resign. Two jobs and full time school would have been way too much anyway. He really needs to focus on Learning from his classes, not just passing them.
Me? Well, I'm really tired at the moment. Fine, but tired. Nothing too exciting to report.

So, that's how we're doing...
I'll post more photos later.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Five Years Old - Kindergarten - and Walking

Five years ago tonight I went to bed pondering the wondrous reality that I would be giving birth to my first child in the morning. Tonight I ponder the fact that my first child will turn five years old tomorrow and enter the real world of Kindergarten...

I honestly don't remember Jakob ever being quite so all consumingly animated, talkative, and excited. We read a lot today. By 7:45PM we had even read all of the letters that Jakob's new teacher wrote to ME. He wanted to hear every word and vowed that he would be the BEST Kindergartner EVER! He talked about all of the ways he was going to help the teacher - which included him bringing pennies for each of the good kids so the teacher didn't have to use hers, how he was going to "make" his new friends make good choices, how much he loved his new shoes even though they didn't flash, how he hoped that everything they talked about would be about dinosaurs or jets -and if they weren't he would ask if he could go to the library to find the "right books." He must still be talking to himself after we've tucked him in for bed because Lady is barking and she only barks at night if he's talking. I gave him a calming herbal remedy so he will actually fall asleep tonight.

Ahhh, he's growing up... sometimes it is such a joy to have a little mind with a mouth to sit and jabber with about the simple wonders of the world. Then at times it is as if someone has jumped inside that little mind and he would rather blow me up with his "pretend" missiles that are filled with his Anger then sit with me at all. We know he is angry because he'll stomp around and yell, "I'm ANGRY!"... Well, at least he uses his words, huh? There is a reason Jakob's blog is titled Mama's Echo... How can I blame him?

Leif gave Jakob a father's blessing tonight. Jakob was beaming after the blessing. He was told that if he would be strengthened physically so he could consistently go to school. He was told that he would be protected while traveling to and from school and while at school. He was told that he would make good friends who would help him feel good and he would help them feel good about themselves. He was also told that if he was ever scared or needed help he could always pray and Father would let him know what was right by giving him a good happy feeling about the "right" decision. In reality, this blessing was also for Jakob's Mama;) I am so very grateful for the power of the priesthood and my husband who willingly serves our family by sharing the blessings with us. All will be well...

My Caleb is moving forward as well. We were at Leif's sisters house last night and all of the sudden Caleb stood himself up and walked. I knew that it would literally be as simple as a choice. He walked several more times that night and a few today. I'm sure he'll be on his feet permanently by next week. It's amazing what can take place in just one day... Caleb hasn't said any real words up to this point. I know they're in there, especially Mama and Papa when he's waking up in the morning. But this morning we all swear that he consciously said AMEN after the prayer on the breakfast. Now that is an interesting first word...

Monday, August 17, 2009

Our Little Lady Bug

I've got to get to sleep! But I thought I'd let you all know that we are finally home from picking up the puppy. We did A LOT of driving to pick her up (all the way to Burley Idaho.) But Leif jokes that the 14 total hours of driving was equivilent to labor and delivery.:)

We've named her Lady Bug, Lady for short. She is Very Very sweet and we all love her! Potty training is going to take work, no surprise there. Sleeping in is not an option, also not too upsetting. So far, she worth it. Just to hear my boy's laughter and enthusiasm with her is a joy! She is extremely patient and puts up with little Caleb's "loves" well. We took pictures of her playing with everyone on my parents computer. So I'll put them on asap. They show the little twinkle in her eyes. Yep, We love her. And if you feel like you can add something else into your prayers on our behalf, pray that she will learn quilckly where the right place to pee is, and that she can endure her kennal until 7:00 At Least. Thanks!:)

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Our Newest Addition: A Family Puppy

Shorkie (Shi tzu/Yorkie) 9 weeks

We have been pondering the idea of inviting a puppy into our family for a while now. Jakob's 5th birthday is coming up and we decided that it is a good time. My parents got a puppy and he enjoyed playing with her and taking care of her. The only thing that made him hesitant to be with her was the puppy's big size. Otherwise, he's been talking about her quite a bit. Soo, we started looking for a puppy that fit our little house and our little kids. We looked for over a week at dozens of puppies and none of them struck me like this little lady. The minute I saw her, I knew she was the one. Sounds silly, I know. But this was a big decision for us and we aren't taking it lightly. She was born up north near our family there. So we're heading out Saturday to pick her up. So far, this was the BEST pregnancy I've ever had!:) Short and sweet. LOL!

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

What Heaven Will Be Like

It's nap time again. A quiet time for me to reflect. I finally took the time to watch a few slide shows that my dad put on his blog of the Westwood Reunion. We missed it this year and I feel bad about that. We couldn't go. But I wish...

As I looked through the photos my mind wandered. I thought about the wonderful people in the photos and the love that I have for them. I thought about the other family members that weren't at the reunion and how much I love them. I reflected on the fact that more often then not, while I'm standing in front of my kitchen sink scrubbing a mountain of dishes, my mind wanders to my extended family members and how I wish that we all lived close by each other as we did during our younger years. And of course, my mind wandered to our precious matriarch, my grandmother, Rhea. How we miss her and would love to have her with us.

And finally, the thought came to me, That is how Heaven will be! We will be together. We will be busy, but chances are we'll be able to make it to our family reunions. ALL of us!

A New Experience: Perseids Meteor Shower

Last night we kept the kids up past their bedtime so we could take a drive to show them this. The Perseids Meteor Shower was beautiful. We drove out to the edge of town past the lights and enjoyed the view. We were able to clearly see the Milky Way as well as several meteors. We all loved it! Jakob was especially excited. He had made a telescope out of bamboo that he insisted would help him find the meteors. We snuggled together on the hood of the car while Caleb slept in his carseat in the back. It was a special night...

BTW: The Photo is from National Geographic

Tuesday, August 11, 2009


I knew that was bound to happen with my last post. No, I'm not pregnant at this point. A few more months or so...

Monday, August 10, 2009

Home Schooling Jakob

I can't take a nap today (or I won't be able to fall asleep again for the fourth night in a row.) So, I'll blog. I must voice my gratitude for nap time!!!

So, if you know me really well, you know that I have a hard time making a big decision and sticking with it. If you didn't know that, now you know. Marrying Leif was the easiest "big"decision I have had to make, and possibly the only one I haven't had the urge to look back and reevaluate the decision. I have concluded that it's just in my chemistry and genetic make up to struggle with coming to decisions and being content with them.

So, that is my explanation as to why two days ago I was determined to home school Jakob, and today we are planning his first day of kindergarten. Honestly, I want to home school Jakob. If it were the ONLY big project on my plate this school year, he would be home and we would be exploring the wonders of the world. As it stands, it would not be the only project on my plate this year. It is no secret that we are going to have one (or more) children. Because this is the case, this upcoming school year will undoubtedly be filled with moaning and groaning from Mama Baron about the ups and downs of pregnancy. This will be the Big project this year, and it is possible that we will home school next year. I am trying to be content with the decision.

I looked into our school's test scores. It is not just the bad morale of the school that pushes me towards home schooling. The school has only earned a 50% grade on their Reading and Math skills. The school right across the state border is at least up to 70%. To me, this is a clear enough example of why I might be home schooling my kids in the future. As parents, of course we will supplement our children's education at home... but what if that's not enough? We shall see...

Saturday, August 08, 2009

Quiet Blogging World...

WHERE IS EVERYONE!!!!???? Are you there? Or are you all out soaking up the last of the summer sun? Either way, hope you're all well! Some of you are in MO for the wedding, and I Wish We Were There!!!! Miss ya'll...

Friday, August 07, 2009

Mormon Messages

Tonight I have been working on my Sunday lesson for Young Women's. I came upon the Mormon Messages page on YouTube. What a precious resource for good. Now I have so many video clips to choose from, I'm not sure which to choose. But I'll worry about that later. I just wanted to share a few that really struck home tonight. Enjoy!

ACTUALLY, I wasn't able to embed individual clips for some reason. So I'll let you go there and choose what clips you'd like to watch for an uplifting moment during the vicissitudes of your day. Here's the link: Mormon Messages

Thursday, August 06, 2009

Family Prayer Rug: Knotted Shag Rug

When I nannied in Chicago the family and I had family prayer together each morning. Every morning we knelt together on the same heart shaped braided rug in the kitchen. I told myself that one day I would have a Family Prayer Rug, a place to gather my family and pray to our Heavenly father. I have finally started the construction of our Family Prayer Rug.
Monday night we had Family Home Evening. Jakob gave the lesson. Because I was the one whispering the message in his ear, the subject was about prayer. We talked about how Heavenly Father has asked us to talk with Him daily and prayer is the way we can talk with Him. After the lesson we went outside together to make the loom for our Family Prayer Rug and to gather material from grandma's sewing room.
Earlier I found the instructions that I needed for our rug. I wanted one that was easy enough for Jakob to help me make the rug. I found two Great websites explaining how to make a Knotted Shag Rug: HERE and HERE. Both websites tell how to construct the simple loom (I'm not sure it's really a loom, but it's the tool needed) as well as pictures and instructions of how to make the rug.

I am going to construct the rug out of old Levis, tee shirts, and knit shirts. I haven't seen or heard mention of any of these rugs made out of Levis. I'm just hoping that it's not a mistake. I have cut the denim strips thin so they knot easier. Our local library has a Freecycle program where they give away thrift store clothing to the community for free. We went to the library and rounded up some yellow shirts for our rug. We then went to the hardware store and purchased some cotton Light Load 2 lb limit Wrapping Twine. This is our first rug and I'm hoping it will be a success, Hoping is the key word!

Here are a few pictures of our project in progress:

Swirling Thoughts: Inside Our World

It's no wonder that I was having tornado dreams. My mind, heart, and world have been in a whirlwind for the last week or so. This post is going to be me just pouring out the thoughts and events swirling around. Then maybe some of them can be laid to rest. So, in no particular order of importance or time, here it goes.

I am finally getting around to making our Family Prayer Rug. I am thrilled, and I will post all of the details in another post (sorry;)

For several weeks now I have had an undercurrent emotion about not having my girls. In my mind, Everyone has little girls. Please don't feel bad if you're one of the "everyone" that I'm talking about. It is nothing against you, and I'm not Angry at you for this fact. It's just a fact, you have little girls, and mine are unavailable at the moment. It's a real bummer! These emotions started to surface while we were in Brigham City (where the girls are buried.) I got out of the car at Leif's grandpas house and my eyes were drawn to the cemetery at the end of the street. Naturally my mother heart longed for the little girls whose body's lay in that cemetery. Then I went school clothes shopping with my sister in law for her daughter. It didn't take long for the emotion of it all to start bubbling inside. I would never be able to buy these cute clothes for my little girls. I decided it might be best if I stuck to looking at books for my boys (the boys clothes were no fun at that store.) Just last night I was surrounded by all of my friend's little girls. They are all beautiful and around the age that my girls would be. They are a good reminder of what I have to look forward to in the eternities. Until then, I miss them and the opportunities that would have been ours if they were here.

Jakob's a handful lately (no, always.) Not usually in a naughty or mean way, just a needy and entertain me kind of way. This is already wearisome for me, and then I ended up with an unexpected turn of events. For the last week or so I started noticing a pattern. Every time I thought about the fact that Jakob would be starting kindergarten I was overwhelmed by a dark cloud, a feeling I could not ignore. I finally talked to Leif about it. I was surprised by this feeling because I have been thrilled and looking forward to Jakob going to school. In fact, we were going to have him go to kindergarten and preschool to give me more time in the day and him more schooling. So when I started feeling like I needed to reconsider the plan, it has thrown me off a bit.

I need to explain our schooling situation where we live. We live in a very small community. I wish I knew the numbers. But the fact that Jakob's whole kindergarten program alone would have less then 30 kid's in it might tell you something. Another indication of the size is the fact that several grades in elementary only have ONE teacher for the Whole grade. Basically, when the kid's start out in kindergarten together they continue through school all together until they graduate high school. Leif's graduating class was less then 30 kid's (that's the WHOLE senior class.) So that gives you an idea of the numbers. Because of the low numbers of student's the budget for the teachers is low. But one of the main struggles that faces the school is the low morale of the students and parents that then rubs off on the teachers and administration. Now, this of course is up for debate constantly in the town and it depends on who you talk to whether things are good or not. But in my opinion, things are not good. Leif and I had originally decided to just pay attention to our children and give them extra help and resources for learning as they needed it. But now, we feel that the best option for us will probably be home schooling. At the moment, it seems a daunting option. But I think it will work out well. There are actually several families in our area who are going to home school and we'll set up a co-op so we can meet together often for fun learning. Jakob will also be involved in the community with dance, T-Ball, church, and whatever else comes up. So he won't be lacking for social interaction any more then he already is. Now, I just have to come up with a plan for the future. I have a few ideas. I'll keep you posted on this.

The reason this is such a daunting idea is because I already struggle with making the sacrifice necessary to meet my children's needs. I have concluded that I am selfish, plain and simple. It is TRUE! I constantly have one thing or another that I want to work on. A blog subject here, a rag rug there, a great book here, an email there. There is always Something that I would rather spend my time doing other then sitting on the floor building a train track. Some mother's are gifted with the art of PLAYING, I am Not. I love to read stories. If I take a moment with the kids, it most likely involves reading a story. However, I MUST change this within myself. I know this passion is within me, to play and explore life and learning along side my children. I just have to tell myself it is time, and DO IT! I think the easiest way for me to accomplish this will be to create a semblance of structure for our day. Not necessarily a rigid structure. But if I have a handful of ideas of things to do each day, I will be able to stay entertained. Yes, I said I will stay entertained. At this point, Jakob is fighting for my attention constantly. If I just surrender my time, he will be entertained and if I plan ahead I will be entertained. Pray with me that it works...

Caleb is a Busy Boy! Jakob has successfully taught him how to throw a fit. Luckily, I've seen worse. But it's still a bummer! I need to find him more age appropriate toys and books. He and Jakob are quite different in their interests at this age. Caleb enjoys more hands on, real life toys. Where Jakob enjoyed books and simplified things. Caleb is sitting next to me talking on my cell phone. He is a Precious little man! He has discovered his stacking toys. I need to find more things like that... Caleb has been fed more sugar in the last three months then Jakob was given in his first two years of life. The PediaSure drinks are PACKED with Sugar. Now that he will eat more food because of his teeth we're cutting back the PediaSures and encouraging whole milk and formula, along with Food, Food, Food.

Young Women's is overwhelming at times. We really need to find a way to revive the girls' enthusiasm...

Leif, ahhh Leif... Well, he's done with Summer semester classes. Fall classes start in a week or so. During his short break he's hoping to add on to our existing chicken coop and begin building another chicken coop. There is a Very Rare breed of chicken that has been brought into the US that Leif is hoping to breed and sell. People are paying A LOT of money for the rare birds. It's pretty amazing. So, that's his latest project. When it comes to employment, the school called him and offered him a job. Leif quit last year because of the 20 credit hours in school he'll be working on in the Fall. But the school has several positions they need filled and they offered (well, it's not official yet, but soon will be) a position working with the in-school suspension kids. This will give Leif the time he'll need to do his homework throughout the day along with his job duties. So we'll see how that goes. He will also be working again with Coconino Community College as their F(our town) representative. So, once again Leif will be a VERY Busy man this year. But we'll manage. I want to help Leif with some idea we've had with his church calling as well. He is the children's primary music chorister. The Sacrament meeting program is coming up, I hope to help him find some posters or flip-charts to help the kids learn the words to the songs. He has done an amazing job so far. He focuses a lot of his Sundays teaching the kids the principles and meaning behind the words to the songs. But it is difficult to help the kids memorize the words to the songs when they're only practicing once a week. So I hope I can help him find what he needs...

The garden has flourished this year. It is no thanks to me. I have weeded the thing a total of two or three times this season. Leif on the other hand has watered it daily and nourished it to fruitation. We recently harvested the garlic:) That is exciting! The potatoes are going to be Wonderful! We picked a few and fried them up with a couple of onions we harvested as well. The tomatoes are still keeping us hopeful. Now the squash, that's a different story. We get squash bugs every year. Eventually, they always end up taking over the squash. Next year, we're not planting squash. Oh! We had a good crop of beets this year too. I've made a cake with them so far that was delicious. And I hope to continue experimenting with beet recipes for the next little while.

Our house is cozy as ever. Sprinkled in through my contentment in our situation is an occasional day dream of how we could build on to the barn (our home) to make things more spacious, or heaven forbid move in to another place. But in all honesty, I just don't want to go anywhere else right now. Sure I'd love a wall to my bedroom and an office. But for now, I'll settle for the makeshift bathtub that we're going to install. Now that is going to be interesting... Just wait for the pictures!

Me? Well, just read what I wrote up to this point and you'll find me. This is my world. I really do love it. Along with all of this, I have a love for reading good books. I don't mean good like WOW that was a great Story! I mean, WOW that changed my life type book. If I start reading a novel and I realize that it will not uplift me in any positive way, then I can't waste my precious time reading it. If I am going to make the sacrifice to read, I must get something from the book in return. I love Anita Stansfield because her books teach me through incredible stories. I love historical fiction novels as well. I love to learn about the lessons of the past and how I can apply them to my every day life. Those are Lena type books...

Life is swirling, rolling, evolving, growing, Good!

Monday, August 03, 2009

Tornado Dreams

My dreams have been perplexing the last couple of days. I can only remember the dreams that take place towards dawn, around 4-8AM but they have all had a similar theme. In one dream I was trying to convince my mother in law that the wing of an airplane (that looked like a replica of the airplane the Wright Brother's flew) was not a safe place for Caleb to be strapped to. I was So Angry! No one understood why I was so upset, not even my grandmother (who randomly showed up in the dream.) Very Strange Dream. I'm pretty sure I had a tornado dream that night as well. Last night I definitely had a tornado dream. I was in a house and I looked out the window just as three tornadoes were forming out of the sky. Again I was with my MIL and another little girl. We had to climb under a tiny table for protection and I was frantically praying out loud as the tornado hit because I knew that Caleb was in the next room and I feared the worst and prayed for a miracle. I ran in the room and he was perfectly fine. However, there were two litters of puppies in the room and some of them were fine and some were not.

The last few nights have been strange to say the least... I'm trying to figure out where these dreams are coming from... Any thoughts?
At the moment I am thinking baby loss dreams, combined with the fact that Caleb isn't feeling well and I must have been pondering that, What my mother in law has to do with anything I have no idea. Maybe I feel like I just want to live in a bubble and raise my kids without feeling the need to please the people around me. Maybe she represents many people in my life, people I naturally seek approval from. Possibly??

Saturday, August 01, 2009

Just Our Family Fun

We were able to stay up north longer then the rest of the family. So we took a couple of days and went to a couple of places just for Jakob. We went to the Hill Air force Base Museum and the Ogden Dinosaur Museum Park. We had a great time at both places. Jakob has a passion for jets and the military. We had to go to that museum twice. I do fear that he might actually follow through with his desire to become a pilot in the military someday. Leif and I take it serious enough that we have concluded that we'll accept it and guide him towards a mission and then the Air force Academy if he really wants to go the military route. But that's not for about 12 more years, right? Anyway, the dino museum was awesome too. In between our museum visits we were able to spend more time with my parents and my brother Jared, which is always nice.

On the way home we stopped at the Young Family Lavender Farm. The smell as you get out of the car is amazing. the fields of lavender are beautiful. But the secret of the farm is that they have a mid evil era village build on their property, equipped with ponds and paddle boats, a jousting arena, and midevil playground equipment. And across the way from that they have a western town set up. Leif and I couldn't find anyone to talk to about what in the world they use the space for. But we concluded that it would be a fun place for a family reunion.

All in all, the trip was full and Very Fun! We were exhausted, I'm STILL exhausted! But the time away was much needed. I played with my kids because I didn't have the computer. It reminded me of what my role is right now as a mother. Now if I can only apply the lesson...

Reunion End

Towards the end of our time at the Canyon Home my parents came up to visit. We had a great time together visiting. We went to the cemetery to visit the girls' grave. We also went to the Baron Woolen Mills to explore. It is vacant and run down now, but spooky and interesting. I am writing a fictional story about the mill that is based on true stories about the haunted woolen mill. So it was fun to explore parts of the mill and gain more vision into my story.

Reunion Fun

The days and events at our Mark Baron Family Reunion are a blur. We had a lot of fun together. We missed our family members who weren't able to make it this year! We hope to get everyone together next year around the same time.

This first slide show is pictures of us just hanging out enjoying each other's company and the beauty of the canyon home.

This next slide show is of our unexpected, very long, bumpy, and fun drive up to Willard Peek. We drove in Erik's 4 wheel drive truck following a trail up the mountains to 9,400 feet up. Leif and I sat in the bed of the truck with Jakob, Victoria, and the big dog Kiefer. Leif and I got pretty sunburned and I wish I could say I was a cheerful trooper to the end, but we do have some good memories. One of my favorites is of our trip down and Faylynn and Stacy rode in the bed of the truck with the kids. They were much more cheerful then I, they sang songs with the kid's much of the way. The hills were covered in wildflowers there was also a natural spring running out of the hills that was Very refreshing. when we finally made it to the top we were able to see all the way to Idaho on the north and Nevada to the south, an amazing view similar to the view from an airplane. When we stopped at the water everyone scattered to go use the natural facilities, Leif wandered off too. However, he melted my heart upon his return when he handed me a bouquet of beautiful wildflowers. I had no idea that he was gathering them for me and I felt very lucky to be his wife.

Our Anniversary Get-Away

Leif feeling a bit rebellious!:)
We took a vacation the last week or so of July. Our wedding anniversary is that week so we took the chance to spend some time together ALONE! It was blissful... We left the kids with Leif's parents and we drove 6 hours to Providence, Utah. Along the way we enjoyed munching on treats (without any little voices asking us to share!) and we listened to the audio of the Twilight book throughout the trip. When we arrived at the Providence Inn Bed&Breakfast we were thrilled at how nice everything and everyone was. They provided all of the guests with treats and drinks during there stay, and the room was AWESOME! The breakfast was wonderful as well. We stayed in the Victorian Room, yep, BLISS!

We stayed over for one night. The next day we went to an afternoon movie of the latest Harry Potter, Very Fun! Again, just to sit together and not be wrestling with the kid's was a treasure. However, I thought that I wanted to be away from the kids for a few days. In reality, I was anxious and missing them by the next day. One night is good enough for now... Anyway, back to our trip, we went out for a yummy dinner and then drove down to Brigham City to Leif's family's Canyon Home. We took a long (uninterupted) nap and then sat outside and listened to our book together. By bedtime Leif's family showed up (bringing our kids) and we started our Family Reunion. Which will lead me to another post.
So, Leif and I have been married for six wonder-filled years. Thank you My Love for running away with me to celebrate!

Update: Lena's World

There is so much to tell, so much to update! I can't put it off any longer. This will be the first of a series of posts. I think I'll make this an update about me and my world.

I'm done with school! I took English composition II and earned a 96%. Yes, I was very thrilled! I also took Creative Writing and earned a 94%. This was the class that was a challenge for me. I wasn't sure what my grade would turn out to be, so I was Thrilled! School was a good experience, but I'm glad I'm done for a while. I created a Writing Portfolio as extra credit in my creative writing, so you can check it out at

I have several things that I hope to accomplish in the near future. First, I want to get my blogs updated. Then I want, no, Need to deep clean my house. By then I'll be sick of busy work and I will start making the Family Prayer rag rug that I've wanted to make for years. In the meantime, I am trying to figure out why Jakob's knees and shins are hurting (yes, probably growing pains.) And, I need to do things for my Young Women's calling and I want to help Leif do some things for his calling. I am also finishing up the Captain's series by Anita Stanfield for the second time, I LOVE this series and highly recommend it! Leif and I have agreed to switch books with each other while he's out of school for a couple of weeks this month. I will read one of his fantasy's and I want him to read this series.;) So now that I've made a list for myself you can wish me luck!
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