Wednesday, December 26, 2018

Hold Me Back

I just spent the day reading the book "Is It Night or Day?" by Fern Schumer Chapman. It is a story published by Scholastic that I borrowed from my boys' Christmas present stash. 
It was a Sad Story! And if you know me well, you know that I Hate books and movies with sad endings. Gratefully, this book ended on a somewhat happy note.
But all of that is beside the point that I began pondering while reading this book. I've been struck by this thought before. And it sounds almost boastful of myself. But it's not meant to be...
The thought that hits me every once in a while is this, "what if I am given all of these health struggles as a way to hold me back? To keep me from taking on the world... to keep me from running to give aid to everyone and everything i see who needs it. To keep me grounded and focused on what He wants me to focus on Right Now. What if?... And then the thought, "Okay. Then When?" ...  I ask, as my mind daydreams about all of the possibilities.
But then I remember. Not Now. "Hold Me Back." Keep me where I am truly most needed. Most helpful. Most happy. Most Right. Right Now.

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